Monthly Archives: August 2015

Blogging on the Run: A Review of What’s New at Clinique. 

What is new at Clinique? Let’s find out, and let’s try it on while we are at work and blog about it on my break as I eat my grilled chicken wrap from Wendy’s. I’m so freaking glamorous, it’s exhausting. 

Chubby Lash Fattening Mascara



Swatches: Massive Midnight, Jumbo Jet, Two Ton Teal, Portly Plum. 

I came in to work wearing Portly Plum. Let’s have a gander:

As you can see, it’s a very subtle purple. Totally wearable for the color shy. On a side note, the brush has flexible teeth so it grabs the lashes gently to lengthen and separate. 

Clinique Skinny Stick Eyeliner

Swatches: Skinny Jeans, Lanky Lapis, Slim Sable, Slimming Black, Black Sliver, Angel Hair, Demi Grape. 

I decided to play around with Slim Sable and Angel Hair 

*These were applied in a rush while no customers were around. Btw, first customer of the day came to return 6 items which were probably from 2010. Good times. 

Personally, I love the Slim Sable, but the Angel Hair on the lower rim made my eyes look like I was an anime character. The Lanky Lapis and the Black Sliver both have a shimmer in them which is very pretty. My favorite is the Slim Sable because it adds to the lash line without overwhelming it. 

Have you had enough pictures of my giant eyeballs? Because now we are going to talk brows. 

Just Browsing Brush On Styling Mousse. 

Blonde, Light Brown, Deep Brown, Black/Brown. 



Ok these are a bit awkward to swatch. But let’s talk about them. This is the same size of the Bottom Lash Mascara in terms of product and brush applicator. It’s a nice, thick mousse that locks those unruly brows into place AND covers grays. I’m happy to report that isn’t a concern just yet. Don’t be jelly.  (Knock on wood) #Superstitious.   

Let’s see the brows and the eyes together!



*Taken in the restroom by the baby changing station. I told you, I’m exhausted by my glamourous nature. Or I think I just exhaust myself in general.

TRUTH BE TOLD, while I started this post in the food court as I was eating my Wendy’s snack wrap, I had to stop to finish it at home. The post, not the wrap. The wrap was just ok. This post was delicious 😘. 

Till next time…

Smooches! 💋

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Ipsy August: Prep School Dropout. 

Oh hi, August Glam Bag. You finally came in. Not like I was waiting on you like a fat cat threatening a hunger strike:



I have to say, I’m really into two of the products in this bag, so I’m willing to forgive the wait. Let’s see what’s inside!

*I have made an attempt at using some effort and creativity by throwing in an apple. Because when you go to prep school, you need an apple. Unless apples have now been banned because of food allergies. 

Let’s talk about love:

Hikari Lip Gloss in Merlot: This color. Wowza! So much pigment and shine. It’s kind of the perfect color for me. I was worried they were going to send me the lighter shade, but it looks like they did their homework. (The first of many school puns to follow)

Trust Fund Beauty Nail Polish in Elegantly Wasted: I’m not sure if you are aware of my love for purple, but it’s real and it is deep. I can’t say this color reminds me of the fall, but it does take me back to the summer before my first year of college. I went into the city with my best friend Stacey and we both got pastel manicures for dirt cheap. So this color wins for nostalgia, and the name is incredible too. I will probably admire it in the bottle until I forget I own it. Look for my review on it 6 months from now when I remember to use it.

Let’s talk about like:

Eyeshadow Brush from  Marsk: Or is it a concealer brush? Or both? Either way, getting brushes is always good. Unless it’s a traditional foundation brush- then that’s a snoozefest. 

Marc Anthony Nourishing Argan Oil of Moracco: I haven’t used this yet, and I’m ok with receiving it (even if it is a drugstore brand). I’m just using this post to confess that whenever I see Marc Anthony Haircare I feel like this is the mastermind of the operation:



Is he? Is Carlos Santana behind Santana shoes? These are questions that pass through my mind, but ultimately I do not care enough to google the answers. 

Let’s talk about NOPE:

Doucce Cosmetics Ultra Precision Eyeliner: This is supposed to be a black waterproof eyeliner. It is more of a soft black and there is no way in hell it is waterproof. Eventually it crept into my eyeballs and it stung. BOOOOO! BOOOO I say!

So now here is a pic of me wearing the gloss and liner and rocking a blowout.  I unexpectedly got my hair did yesterday: 



Note: I put black shadow over the liner to make it show up more

And now this one cuz I look like a cross between Snow White and the Evil Queen:



OMG that Lipcolor!  YOU NEEEEEED THIS. 

Hope you’ve enjoyed my Prep School review. September 1 starts year two of grad school. #Prayers4Nessa

Till next time…

Smooches! 💋

Brows Gone Wild 🐛🐛

What the hell has happened to eyebrows on social media? 



There, I said it. Look, I get the whole “Eyebrows are the frame to the windows of the soul” idea (I love when the makeup world gets deep btw), but sometimes frames are so heavy they are going to make the whole foundation crack. 

There are people out there who do amazing eyebrows. I love these looks because they are polished and pretty and do not OWN the face. 







*Side note: There are plenty of bad pictures of brows on Insta. However I am not going to post those because although I’m snarky, I’m not a jerk. AND, I’m far from perfect. I make mistakes too. 

Here is a visual story about my own recent adventure with a brow-dip fail:

So I see this brand of brow pomade at CVS called Ardell, and I’m intrigued. I’ve always used liners and powders, but I was curious to try a pomade. AND it was around 7 dollars and I had a 25% coupon- sold. I get home and decide to just wing it and not even look at the directions. I lightly dipped the spool into the jar and brush on my brows. 

This is what happened:

Edit

Full on Cara Delevingne without her looks or money. 

Right before I could wash it off the Verizon guy comes to my apartment to fix my TV I’m sure he wanted to fix the brows too.

I decided to try again today. Instead of slapping it on blindly, I read the directions and achieved a normal human-being brow. 



*One brow is slightly more structured. I’m still trying to find a balance. 

Let’s look at a side by side for proof that normal human-being brows are the way to go. Oh, and also a reminder to always follow directions:



We all can make mistakes. However, it’s important to learn from them, and more importantly, learn not to post these mistakes on Instagram with the hashtag #browsonfleek. 

Tell next time…

Smooches! 💋

CK ONE All Day Perfection LIPCOLOR: Perfection Indeed

There are just some things make my heart skip a beat. They are: good coffee (literally), ice cream, Nutella, and lipstick. Oh wait, and like true love and all that stuff too. But seriously, I love my lipstick and I am truly a lipstick junkie. Check my lipstick drawer, ok drawers, and- oh hell I basically have a lipstick closet. #AddictionIsRealY’All. I will take lipstick in a bullet, in a crayon, and in a liquid too. Sometime that’s my absolute fav because it’s like a gloss on steroids- smooth and packed with color. 

I’m losing you so I’m going to resort to pretty, pretty pictures now:

Beautiful, ain’t they? I couldn’t capture all of them because I was in Ulta and I had to keep my secret photoshoot brief. However, I did get some swatches, and the stink eye from a beauty advisor. 



Let’s look with a flash, ahhhh, ahhh! 

🎶 (Bonus points for recognizing that song. Oh and ps, you’re old) 

Let’s talk about the pros and cons:

PROS:

  1. Rich, pigmented color. 
  2. No offensive odor or taste. 
  3. Only 16 bucks (that’s inexpensive for a luxury brand)
  4. Beautiful color selection
  5. Darker colors probably stain the lips. 
  6. Smooth, non paint-like texture
  7. Literally from heaven. Angels made these and delivered them to Ulta so everyone can have soft, sexy lips. 

Cons:



My personal favorites are Untamed and Provoke. A mauve and a grapey wine. Because I’m predictable. 

This is how Untamed looks on:

A little more orangey than I’d like, but still a pretty, deeper than your lip tone, lip tone. 

I can’t praise these enough. So many of the colors look so flattering on. Since my mom is probably reading this I will go ahead and say that she should look at Rouge. It’s a brown color with a tinge of orange. See Mom, I look out for ya. Now everyone say “Awww.”

As for the rest of ya, get thee to Ulta because it is exclusive to them. Check out CK One’s other lip colors too. I swear they are such an underrated cosmetics brand. 

Till next time…

Smooches! 💋

Birchbox August: Soak it Up! 

So I get my August Birchbox, and the design is kind of adorable…



It makes me want to photoshop myself in there. Because that’s what normal people do, right?

Old picture btw. 

This little pool picture looks like more fun than I’ve had all summer. If you don’t follow my blog, I’m in grad school and I just finished my summer session. This summer has been The Summer of Nope. In fact, if I were curating a Birchbox I would give it that name and fill it with products for sad, pale people. 

Let’s talk contents:



Not bad. I’m actually ok with it because I’m happy with 3 out of 5 products. *Update: 2 out of 5 :/

Let’s talk about those first:

  • LAQA & CO Charm School Kit (One of the three in the kit) in Humble Brag. That’s a terrific name, btw. The color is cheery and bright, and the texture is creamy. This is supposed to be for cheeks and lips, but I’m gonna play it safe and just use it on my lips. Why? Cuz I’m a break-out beast and I don’t want to tempt fate. 



  • Coola Makeup Setting Spray: I chose this as my sample, and I thought I was glad I did. It has SPF 30 and it is refreshing. I kinda feel like I would just use it sparingly because :
  1. I fear regular use could tempt the break-out gods. (Is that a whitehead after two minutes of spraying? 😩)
  2. A full size of this is expensive AF. 36 dollars for 1.7 oz, which is so not coola. (This trial size is .34. Someone do math and report the value back to me. God help me when I take assessment this semester). Either way, no thanks. 

UPDATE: * NO LIE: Earlier in the evening I sprayed this Coola spray on my face and it is now 2AM and I have two zits. Anyone want a Coola sample? 

  • Supergoop Forever Young Hand Cream with SPF 40: A teeny tiny sample just big enough to coat a finger. I’m anxious to try, but not actually buy. The full size is 34 bucks. Looks like I will embrace gnarly witch-like hands instead. 

Now, the rejects:

  • Beauty Protector/Protect & Detangle: Ehhhh. The smell. Not a fan of the smell. It’s a cross between a mixed drink and a taxicab air freshener. I couldn’t stand a spritz of this on my hand, let alone coating my entire mane. 

And speaking of things that smell bad…

  • Hello by Harvey Prince: HARVEY. FREAKING. PRINCE. As soon as I saw the word “Hello” I said, “Goodbye!” I’ve gotten this crappy scent, along with a ton of other Harvey Prince scents. I’m sorry, but he’s like the guy you gave your number to ONCE and just keeps showing up everywhere and you can’t lose him. Ugh, Harvey- I can’t! Can I get a restraining order on a perfume???!!!

     Well, that’s all for now. I hope you enjoyed my beauty babble. Oh, and if you are an actual human being who is excited to receive Harvey Prince samples, feel free to leave a comment. I need proof that people like you exist. 

Till next time…

Smooches! 💋

Makeover Time with My Niece-Nugget, Miss Sara

Even though my niece is 15, I still see her like this:



That was six years ago. This is her now:



SAY WHAAAAAATT?

Where has the time gone? 

Tonight she went to her friend’s quinceñera and she asked me to do her makeup. 

Here are some shots of the makeup up close:







As you can see, she has spectacular eyes (spectacular everything, really). So I did a brown smokey eye with burgundy and mocha tones. It’s a shame the burgundy isn’t registering, but it really made her green eyes pop. 

I’d list all the makeup, but I lost track. 🙊 #BeautyBloggerOfTheYearRightHere

I will say that I used several palettes from Smashbox, Urban Decay, and Makeup Revolution. A little here and a little there. I can’t even tell you how many palettes I own, and they never get any use except the rare occasions I do makeovers outside of my usual job. So I am happy to do makeovers to justify my insatiable hunger for makeup palettes I will never use. 

Anyway, she looked amah zah zing and I totally feel like a proud aunt; or as her and her brother call me, “Gigi”.   

I’d like to note that although she is gorgeous, Sara is just as beautiful on the inside too – and she’s a wise-ass, like me. 

😢 Brings a tear to my eye. 

Till next time…

Smooches! 💋



Tuesday Throwback! 1990’s fashion, beauty, and hair trends. From Rave Hairspray to Raver clothing. 

Maybe it’s because my twentieth high school reunion is coming up



But I’m kinda feeling like a trip down 1990’s memory lane. I bet you if there is an actual memory lane, the 1990’s version would have a carpool lane. 

Anyway, the 1990’s were an interesting time for trends. It seems like we began the decade with some of the 1980’s stuck to us, but by the end of the decade a true 1990’s style was established. If you feel the need to revisit that style, head into Urban Outfitters or H&M these days. But here’s my rule, if you left the party the first time around, don’t be the guest that keeps coming back. *Exception: 90’s shoes. Clunky and comfortable. Love, love, love. 

K, let’s take a Hair Photo Journey



This. This was the go-to hair glue of the early 90’s and even through the mid 90’s. If you wanted some crunchy tendrils you’d spritz some of this on wet hair. Super hot look. Mornings at  my household were spent spritzing Rave until my sister and I couldn’t breathe.  I can still taste the hairspray aftermath in my mouth. 



When Rave wasn’t enough, you had a variety of hair gels to shellac your do’



By 1996, the Rave was tossed and haircare had reached a new level for me. My hair stylist introduced me to Biolage, an expensive new habit. This stuff smelled amazing (at the time) and made your hair shiny. Oh, but it only came in  one size: ginormous. 

Let’s look at pants now:



Seventh grade. This is what cool kids wore in seventh grade. I’m glad I wasn’t cool. 



But yet I could t resist the allure of a quality pair of Z Cavariccis. These were around 80 bucks back in 1991, and that was quite a big deal. My mom would not give in, so I settled for Z Cavariccis shorts from the clearance rack. 



This is how we ended pants in the 1990’s– by taking out the waist cinching and pleats, and putting all the material in the lower leg area. Jncos made your feet a mystery. It was like you were a levitating raver child every where you went. 

Shoes:



OMG these. Back then you could wear your white Keds with anything. From shorts to dresses. Or at least you thought you could wear them with anything. 

This is how we ended shoes in the 1990’s:



I’m happy to say that clod hopper platforms have had a rebirth and my feet have never been happier! Even if they go back out of style, I’m holding on. After all, I’m a much nicer person when my feet don’t hurt. So I’m doing to for society. 

Finally, let’s talk beauty!



I washed my face with Noxzema, even though it broke me out like nobody’s business. I learned about it from other friends who also had a collection of pimples. How was this spread around as a good idea? Did someone’s parents have stock in this company? 

Edit

Raisin Rage. I remember this campaign, and I know I owned that nail polish on the left. So dark and mysterious. It complemented my moody teenage ‘tude. 



Even though Black Honey has been around FOREVER, it was quite the big deal in my early college years (circa 1997). I work for Clinique now, and I laugh when customers tell me they have never heard about this lipstick. Have they been hiding in a bomb shelter?



The end of the 1990’s brought us some surrrrrious sparkle from Urban Decay. Midnight Cowboy was the ultimate. It rarely just stayed on the eyes- lashes and cheeks were pimped out too. 

Finally, the biggest mistake of the 1990’s. This:

This perfume was death in a bottle. It have everyone a headache, yet we all seemed to wear it. Maybe it was recommended by the same parents who owned stock in Noxema. Just the other day, my sister and I were reminiscing about the strength of this stuff. It inspired me to create some pictures…



Strong enough to kill Superman…



Powerful enough to defeat Goliath…



Able to take on Godzilla. Navy was for real, and nobody was safe from its overwhelming power. 

I hope you’ve enjoyed this trip down memory lane. I hope it was rad, and if you didn’t  like it, you can talk to the hand. 

Till next time…

Smooches! 💋