Tag Archives: makeup artist

Instagram vs Reality

I’m a makeup artist who rarely wears a great deal of makeup. Most days I run out of the house to get Smarshmucks without much makeup on at all (I bet you can’t guess that name. #slick). Many times I’m people watching, but sometimes I engage in conversation. When I tell people that in addition to grad school, one of my two or three jobs is being a makeup artist, I get a puzzled look. This is because I usually look like this:

Ok, picture non-styled hair. I’m not that brave to do no makeup AND scrub hair in this post. 

My usual “I tried” look is not much more:

(Foundation, blush, mascara and a strong lip). 

But today I had a conversation with a gentleman about makeup, particularly Instagram styled makeup. I explained my appreciation for the art form, but how I would never leave the house that way. This is mostly because I’m just not comfortable; however, I was looking for an excuse to procrastinate and put my nervous energy to good use. )I start the second two classes of my four classes summer tomorrow. Ay yah yahhhy.)

So here is a heavy makeup look I created and I will list the products below:

This is the amount of product I used


❣Beyond Perfecting #9 Neutral. My summertime tan color. Usually I’m a 4 in the winter, 6.5 in spring/early summer, and now 9 after a tan. 

❣Chubby in the Nude: Clove as contour. 

❣ Dark blush in elf quad

❣Shadows: purple from NYX on lid. Mystery, transforming pearl on lid from itcosmetics, fate nd desire blended in. 

❣ Maybelline waterproof mascara

❣ Urban Decay vice lipstick in Moshpit. 

Verdict: Too heavy. I think I will stick to my usual. FYI Moshpit is an awesome lipstick. I will wear it alone, without competing eyes to throw it all off. 

Till next time. 💋 Smooches!

MUA Professional Brush Cleansing Balm 

Goats are the coolest. If you doubt that statement, google “baby goats” and take in all the cuteness:

And hello, goat cheese!

(Now I want goat cheese)

What you may not be aware of, is that goat’s milk makes for an excellent makeup brush cleanser. 

Yes, but don’t go to Whole Foods and drop a five dollar bottle of G-milk on your brushes. Consider this brush cleanser instead:

Picture from CVS.com

While I’m not sold on everything from MUA, I think this brush cleanser is amazing. It does the job quicker than Beauty Blender brand and it costs less. ($10.00 without coupons or sales). Plus it’s solid, so it’s easy to travel with.

 Let’s look at more from CVS.com:

How about some ingredients?

I bet your wondering how this smells. Well, definitely not like goat, goat milk, or goat cheese! It has a clean perfumed scent that just smells fresh. 

It cleans brushes in a flash, and if you have any white-haired brushes, it gets out every trace of makeup. 

It makes sense that stubborn makeup stains stand no chance against a balm made from a stubborn animal’s milk.  All of this may sound weird, but trust me. It’s not baaaaaaad

I’m lame.  

Till next time!

Smooches! 💋

it Cosmetics Mascara Review: Hello Lashes! Goodbye Wallet. 

Sometimes I love to watch QVC and HSN, but I’ve never actually order from them. I especially loved the demonstrations of mascara from it Cosmetics. Watching Jamie Kern transform skimpy eyelashes into massive spider-like fans is almost hypnotizing. Yet I could never ever justify spending 24 bucks for a mascara- and I never will. Mascara does not have a long life. That’s burning through 24 bucks in 3 months at the most. I’d rather get a foundation, or two movie tix (4 movie tix for cheap movie Tuesdays  😉 or food. Yeah, food is always good too. But Ulta had their 26 days of beauty event and they had that mascara slashed down to 12 bucks I had to bite. Here’s how it looks:

It’s nice. The lashes look long, but I sort of have long lashes anyway.  I do like the texture, which is kind of soft. It does feel like it’s conditioning the lashes. But how much does that help anyway? I decided to consult an expert for that. By consult I mean look up the review on http://www.paulaschoice.com beautypedia. Here’s what they say:

As for the “treatment” claims: ignore them. This mascara cannot enhance lash growth or increase the thickness of the actual lash, as there are no ingredients in the formula that can achieve those claims.”

This proves my point, but I should also note that they give this mascara a glowing review. It may deserve it in the aspects of length and appearance, but the formula is hardly water resistant. One tear and this stuff starts to run. With a PMS waterworks of tears, this stuff is all over your face and you look like a winning pageant contestant. 

So is this mascara worth the hype? At 12 dollars maybe, but at 24 bucks just go to the drugstore and then hit up the movie theater. 

Till next time…

Smooches! 💋


Favorite Fall Color: Wine

Everybody is screaming about pumpkin this and pumpkin that, but I’m all, “Hello people?! It’s Wine Season!”

No, put down the glass Boozerella. The color wine or anything close to it. This is the time of year where the stores explode with wine and rich berry tones. Have a look at the Gap:

Love 😍

Apparently, according to many internet memes, this color in the fall is for “basic bitches.” Well color me basic then, bitches. Cuz I loves me some Bordeaux and Merlot tones. And I still like The GAP. So there. 🍷

Today’s post highlights a lipstick from Clinique’s new line of Color Pop lipsticks. I’m a huge fan of the Plum Pop and Grape Pop, but now I’m switching to Berry Pop for the Fall. This berry tone looks like a wine. It’s a rich, statement-making color. 

Let’s have a look:

This is how it is packaged:

*This picture was taken in my car in a Bank of America parking lot. Because that’s how I do my blogging- in between errands. #Profesh’

This lipstick has a creamy feel and a soft shine. It is long lasting, but because the color is deep you NEED a primer. Otherwise you may get those weird cracked berry lips that are 100% unattractive. 

I love this primer from MAC. 

It smooths/fills out the lips and it provides a slightly tacky surface for lipstick to stick to. 

In my opinion, the best way to wear this is with minimal makeup on the rest of the face. Keep the eyes clean and polished. Let your mouth do the talking. As it usually does, because it’s a mouth and all.  

Well, that about wraps up this post. Btw, that’s a horrible transition phrase. I’m going to run to Starbucks and buy as many pumpkin items as I can so I can fully live out the Fall cliché. 

Till next time….

Smooches! 💋

(Resting basic bitch face)

Blogging on the Run: A Review of What’s New at Clinique. 

What is new at Clinique? Let’s find out, and let’s try it on while we are at work and blog about it on my break as I eat my grilled chicken wrap from Wendy’s. I’m so freaking glamorous, it’s exhausting. 

Chubby Lash Fattening Mascara

Swatches: Massive Midnight, Jumbo Jet, Two Ton Teal, Portly Plum. 

I came in to work wearing Portly Plum. Let’s have a gander:

As you can see, it’s a very subtle purple. Totally wearable for the color shy. On a side note, the brush has flexible teeth so it grabs the lashes gently to lengthen and separate. 

Clinique Skinny Stick Eyeliner

Swatches: Skinny Jeans, Lanky Lapis, Slim Sable, Slimming Black, Black Sliver, Angel Hair, Demi Grape. 

I decided to play around with Slim Sable and Angel Hair 

*These were applied in a rush while no customers were around. Btw, first customer of the day came to return 6 items which were probably from 2010. Good times. 

Personally, I love the Slim Sable, but the Angel Hair on the lower rim made my eyes look like I was an anime character. The Lanky Lapis and the Black Sliver both have a shimmer in them which is very pretty. My favorite is the Slim Sable because it adds to the lash line without overwhelming it. 

Have you had enough pictures of my giant eyeballs? Because now we are going to talk brows. 

Just Browsing Brush On Styling Mousse. 

Blonde, Light Brown, Deep Brown, Black/Brown. 

Ok these are a bit awkward to swatch. But let’s talk about them. This is the same size of the Bottom Lash Mascara in terms of product and brush applicator. It’s a nice, thick mousse that locks those unruly brows into place AND covers grays. I’m happy to report that isn’t a concern just yet. Don’t be jelly.  (Knock on wood) #Superstitious.   

Let’s see the brows and the eyes together!

*Taken in the restroom by the baby changing station. I told you, I’m exhausted by my glamourous nature. Or I think I just exhaust myself in general.

TRUTH BE TOLD, while I started this post in the food court as I was eating my Wendy’s snack wrap, I had to stop to finish it at home. The post, not the wrap. The wrap was just ok. This post was delicious 😘. 

Till next time…

Smooches! 💋

Makeover Time with My Niece-Nugget, Miss Sara

Even though my niece is 15, I still see her like this:

That was six years ago. This is her now:


Where has the time gone? 

Tonight she went to her friend’s quinceñera and she asked me to do her makeup. 

Here are some shots of the makeup up close:

As you can see, she has spectacular eyes (spectacular everything, really). So I did a brown smokey eye with burgundy and mocha tones. It’s a shame the burgundy isn’t registering, but it really made her green eyes pop. 

I’d list all the makeup, but I lost track. 🙊 #BeautyBloggerOfTheYearRightHere

I will say that I used several palettes from Smashbox, Urban Decay, and Makeup Revolution. A little here and a little there. I can’t even tell you how many palettes I own, and they never get any use except the rare occasions I do makeovers outside of my usual job. So I am happy to do makeovers to justify my insatiable hunger for makeup palettes I will never use. 

Anyway, she looked amah zah zing and I totally feel like a proud aunt; or as her and her brother call me, “Gigi”.   

I’d like to note that although she is gorgeous, Sara is just as beautiful on the inside too – and she’s a wise-ass, like me. 

😢 Brings a tear to my eye. 

Till next time…

Smooches! 💋

Insomnia Post: Modiface Make-Over App Adventures At 4 AM-ish

Why is 4 AM my insomnia wake-up time? My body’s natural rhythm is like a hotel front desk clerk giving me a courtesy wake-up call I didn’t ask for. So what’s a girl to do? Distract herself with a makeup app, that’s what! As of there was a better answer. Pfft. 

Have you heard of Modiface? I didn’t  until I was googling apps to try on makeup the other day. Maybe I was looking for a way to try on concealer without doing it in a store; which is gross 99% of the time. 

Y’all are visual people (I know I am), so let’s get to a picture presto. 

A low-key makeup look created this evening/morning/what ever you call this dreadfull hour. 

But this is relatively normal, so let’s get to the fun stuff created within the last couple of days:

A hair try-on (my own makeup). That’s Cici’s hair from The New Girl. #Dreamhair. 

Awww. I don’t know what you’d call that look. Trying to look 20 but somehow looking 40? (I’m 37 btw. Just sayin’)

Tinkerbell look. (K, that’s not Tink but actually some other Hollywood starlet’s hair.)

That’s Drew Barrymore’s hair, and it looks fake; almost like it is fake hair from an app. Middle part= bad plan. 

This app gets you thinking, how would my mom look with a makeover?

That could easily be her photo for a dating website like Cougar.com. But she’s married, and probably going to kill me for that joke. 

By the way, this app could totally be used to deceive others on a dating website because of the complexion perfecting options. 

Let’s get ridiculous…

My sister’s dog, Cooper. Because, because, comedy. Come on, how hysterical is that? The app won’t recognize dog faces (the nerve) so that was done with some crappy photo adjustments on photogrid.  

More human-being looks.

 Celebrity options too. Like Janelle Monae, Kelly Osbourne, and Lourdes. That is one serious mane. 

Pros and Cons time:


  1. The app is free, but with limited choice options
  2. A great way to try on lipsticks (the color names and brands are provided)
  3. Perfect for online dating if you are into deceiving others. 
  4. A fantastic boredom distraction and time suckage. 


  1. The lashes always look fake
  2. The hair mostly looks fake
  3. The eyeshadow shades come in bright, and brighter
  4. The foundation try-ons are not reflective of reality
  5. This app may make you lose touch with reality when you start giving dogs makeovers
  6. You will lose more sleep by indulging in this nonsense at 4:30 AM
  7. OMG, is it almost 5 now?
  8. This isn’t really a list at this point. 

Let’s try to go to sleep. Until next time..

Smooches! 💋

Aww. Coop as a supermodel. Goodnight, for reals now.